It’s been a smooth-sailing, good two-month-and-a-half Korean class and we’re nearly approaching the end of the term. Elementary 1 passed by last year. It seemed like a very long time ago, but now, Elementary 2 is passing by quicker. Tomorrow’s our last class for the week, before the term ends next week. We still have three lessons and a final exam before we graduate (yes we have graduation). So recently…
I helped in checking and doing the first revision of the script for our video presentation. Again, it was not so hard for me since I could type quickly in 한글, so copying dialogues from the book is not much of a trouble. It was checked by our 선생님 yesterday, and everyone read the final script earlier. Time is too short for shooting and editing so we pushed a sudden principal photography after class. I was one of the first casts to do the shoot so I was mega shocked. I’m not very good at memorizing, even small lines so it was hard for me. I probably can speak in Korean for a good straight 20-minute period, but I can’t, on-the-spot memorize.
So what’s our presentation anyway? It’s about a Filipina student who fetched his brother who has been working in Korea for three years. By that time, her brother can already speak in Korean very well (obviously). She, on the other hand, can also speak in small Korean since she *presumably* had classes at my current school. By fetching her brother, it also meant shopping time, dinner, haircut, and every simple thing that Elementary Korean students can do simply, given the opportunity to go to Korea. They encountered people doing everyday things (shopping, etc…), and this is where the book dialogues come. They had a very long bonding time, so when they called it a day, the female student had a dream. She experienced 사계절 (Four Seasons) (again, getting the book dialogues from the book) through her dream, again meeting people through the dream. And by waking up, she realized everything was just a dream.
Sometimes it pains me that everything I’m doing *might* not take me anywhere. By this time, I should’ve already met legit Korean friends. Or just simple people I could talk to. But there isn’t. There are times when I just want to stop studying my Korean thinking this is just wasting my time but then…
I still don’t have a long term goal. I still don’t know what I want, and sometimes, I’m thinking how Korean can be a choice if ever I want to change my career path from being a graphic artist to something that is related to my Korean. I’m planning to study up till I achieve conversational fluency, ability to read simple 신문 or internet articles, full Korean 교과서, and 소설책!!!
There are instances when I’m trying to contemplate if all I’m doing now is just a dream. Of course, working in Korea can be a choice for me, but up till now, I’m too far from even just ‘going there’. I knew a lot of people who don’t even care about 한국어 or 김치, or don’t even know who BIGBANG is, and know Korea only from local Korean TV shows that they barely even watched, or Gangnam Style, and yet, they have been to Korea. Why is it that I have this ‘hardworking mode’ in studying Korean, yet I don’t have opportunities to have Korean friends, orrrrr… YEAH I’M RANTING so let’s stop now. *I’m gonna post my rants in a different entry.
Last week, our teacher asked who’s interested in taking Intermediate 1, because there will be. I am truly excited but then again… *prevents self from ranting*. Anyway, I raised my hand without thinking. These are the things that you don’t think about because the only thing asked was just who’s ‘interested’. But that’s about the same, right? Lol. Now, I’m thinking about it, and how will I do it.
I am currently working from 9-6pm, and I leave at 5 to allow myself a little travelling time. Even if my under times are deducted from my salary, it’s just hard to ask for permission again. Actually, if ever I’m not permitted, I can choose to resign, but then again, where will I get money from my everyday commute, etc? And besides, I’m going to Singapore this November-December for two weeks so I may probably lose about 12 hours from the term *which* disables me to get a certificate. Well certificates are not important for me, but just the thought of not graduating is sad. Aaaaand most importantly, MY DEAR GRAMMAR AND WORDS… Intermediate 1, as how I feel it, would be about 5x more intensive than my classes right now, so missing even a single class would absolutely be cry-worthy.
Now, I’m about 80% sure to take Intermediate 1 just so I could get the book, and by attending the class, I’d still be guided, and afterwards, decide for myself if I would take my Korean lessons deeper through self study. Thinking has been very hard for me. I’m currently at my first job and it’s in a big dilemma with something I love most (right now). But thinking more deeply, I’m still young, I’m not even 2NE1 yet. I’m still 20, I have classmates who are older than me in a huge number of years, so I guess my time is perfect to make wrong (or please please, right) choices and color my life the way I want to.
The world may say it’s blue, but I’m still young so I’ll color it pink. There are still a number of opportunities for me to find a way to revert it back if it’s wrong, or recolor it to a better one if possible. Right now, I’m not in a survival mode where every decision is crucial to the betterment of my life. All the things I have right now are still on the ‘stepping stone’ stage, where I still try to improve myself in a lot of areas, some areas I only discover now, some areas I know for so long, and I try to look at those areas if it could be turned into longer pathways.
One thing should motivate me right now. BIGBANG. Because I’m listening to my BIGBANG playlist right now. *Lol this part of this entry is not making any sense right now*. But maybe, simply saying, make myself realize why I started learning Korean in the first place… And to make more good dreams.
Aaaaaand the whole post is weird because it’s really not about the video presentation. *fail title*.